Reason # 11 The Right MINDSET and having the T-shirt
Every person who enters our lives leaves a mark...
Some leave joy, others might point you in a new directions or bring a lesson. Some inspire, others challenge. But all—whether fleeting or for a long or medium season—have a role in shaping who we are becoming.
When we're caught in a victim mindset, it's easy to view others as sources of hurt, disappointment, or frustration. Life becomes something that happens to us, and people become obstacles or villains. But when we step out of that mindset—when we choose to see life through the lens of growth—we begin to recognize a deeper truth: everyone we meet is either a blessing or a lesson.
The friend who believed in you when you couldn’t believe in yourself—that’s a blessing.
The project or boss who pushed you beyond your comfort zone—that’s a lesson.
The partner who loved you deeply and left suddenly—that’s both.
Every interaction invites reflection. What did this person awaken in me? What part of myself did they mirror back to me—my strength, my insecurity, my longing, my resilience?
People are not here to complete us or break us—they are here to show us where we are whole, and where we still need healing. And when we stop blaming and start observing, we reclaim our power. We learn to ask, What is life trying to teach me here?
This mindset doesn’t deny pain—it transforms it. It doesn’t excuse harm, but it ensures we don’t stay trapped in its shadow. It allows us to grow, not just go through.
So look around at the people in your life, past and present. The ones who loved you, the ones who triggered you, the ones who left too soon. Each one, in their own way, helped you meet yourself more fully.
That being said, I am glad I also learned the following below, which helps me to not be the "Stupid" one anymore. "Have the T-shirt, worn it" - type of thing!
What I have learned:
2. Nothing is permanent (old cliche but true)
3. Today’s friend could be tomorrow’s enemy.
4. Your secrets are like bullets; if you give them to others, one day they might load those bullets into a gun and use them against you.
5. There are a few things you can always rely on that won’t disappoint you: your pockets of inner strength, creativity, imagination, resilience, your health, and above all, your Connection with the True Source!
6. Keep your needs and desires secret from others.
7. Not everyone who talks to you with a smile loves you.
8. Not everyone who calls you “dear,” “beloved,” or “friend” truly cares about you (TV anchors call us "dear viewers" every day, but they don’t know or love any of us).
9. Take care of yourself... make your mind and heart the source of your happiness, and you will never regret it!
10. Enjoy life by being a little crazy because wise people die early!
11. Pursue your small hobbies and passions, even if they seem trivial to others.
12. Never seek a crutch for yourself. Seek Wisdom, not Dogma - Gnosis is the answer! (knowledge of spiritual mysteries)
13. Just because you are kind and empathetic to others, don’t expect the world to treat you the same way.
14. One day, you will realize that you worried more than you needed to... and that life had arranged everything perfectly for you, giving you things you never even hoped or wished for. My mother used to say: "My kind, God maak Sy skuiwe volmaak!!!..."
Here are more ideas I value these days:
1. Stop deep conversations with people who don't see their own problems.
2. Stop being there for those who don’t value your presence.
3. When seeking a happy and passionate life, not everyone will want to join you.
4. Let go of people who aren’t ready to support your journey.
5. If you’re forgotten or ignored, stop giving them your time and energy.
6. Not everyone is meant for you, and you aren't meant for everyone.
7. It’s special when you find someone who appreciates your love.
8. Trying to make someone love you wastes time and prevents new connections.
9. Staying with someone who doesn’t value you keeps you from finding the right person.
10. If you stop reaching out, they may not notice, but that’s okay.
11. Relationships based on your effort alone aren’t true love; they are attachments.
12. You deserve more than settling for less.
13. Time is your most valuable resource, choose wisely who you spend it on.
14. Create a safe space in your life for compatible people.
15. You are not responsible for others’ feelings or actions
AND...
1. Nobody cares, ...well they do - but not the way you think they care
2. Take time to know who you are
3. The more you give the more you receive.
4. No work is beneath you.
5. Start meditating.
6. Don't be afraid to take risks.
7. Don't make decisions when you are emotional.
8. Luck works if hard work runs.
9. Be patient and persistent.
10. You don't need to impress everyone.
11. Listen to learn.
12. Don't take the easy road.
13. Start reading books.
14. Respect others as you would respect yourself.
15. Narrow down your focus bit by bit.
16. You quit, you lose, you fail.
17. Put your best foot forward.
18. Don't bother what other people think.
19. Learn something new everyday.
20. Don't make assumptions.
21. Believe in yourself.
...and that, perhaps, is the greatest gift of all - these kind of wisdoms.
Don't wait till you turn 60 to get it!
Knowing this, is another REASON to celebrate!!!
29 May 2025
LINK:
LINK to Landing page with LINKS to other "REASONS" posts
For Further Reading, click the LINK below
httpsHow-every-person-enters-our-life-chapter-story-Steve-Chinen-/
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